Tuesday, November 29, 2011


Well I have a solution for my car.  Albeit a temporary one, but a solution.  So that is a great deal off my shoulders.  I will have access to it when I need it and it will be safer.  So I hope this is a start to the break I need to get my life back in better order.

I also made some contact with some former clients from my last job to see if they have any freelance work for me.  It will be a pain with taxes, but that really is the least of my concerns at the moment.  I am hoping for the best.

I had a good dinner tonight.  I try to eat one really one good meal a week and tonight was it.  I had steak and a baked potato with a Greek salad.  I found a coupon online so it wasn't overly expensive and if I eat raman noodles at work for the rest of the week I will be good.

I did make up a most of the sales I lost the previous week over the weekend between Black Friday and Saturday.  I was asked to work an extra shift this week so my outlook for the next paycheck seems promising.  We also usually get a bonus between the week of Christmas and New Years.  Last year that helped me stayed housed a few extra months.  The sales are down this year, so it will be less, but if I can get my car fixed I will be grateful.

Friday, November 25, 2011


I had a good day at work today.  I really needed it since I made no money last week whatsoever.  I could have made more if the people I work with were honest, but they are not.  They will cheat and steal to get money.  I am homeless and still realize that I need to still look at myself in the mirror at the end of every day.  But they don't seem to care.

I had a very nice meal yesterday.  I don't think I have seen that much food in one place in a very long time.  It was an expansive buffet.  I ate my fill.  The stuffing was amazing.  I don't know how it was cooked, but I never tasted stuffing that good ever.  I am not a big turkey fan, but there was plenty of other things to choose from too.

I am very tired, had a long day at work.  It was not as busy as they had hoped.  But, I did ok.

I am going to get some sleep since I really need it.  I hope everyone had a very nice Thanksgiving.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011


I am so tired.  Work has been long, but not money making.  I had some sales today, but not very much.  I sold next to nothing last week, so I can't even imagine how small my paycheck is going to be next week.  I can only hope that Black Friday and Saturday are good sales days.  I know I have a decent sale coming on Saturday.  She called today, but she didn't want to deal with the heavy traffic.  Although I heard from others that the traffic wasn't so bad.  I am staying close to work so I don't know what the traffic is, since I walk most places now.

I guess we will see.  I have somewhere to go and eat tomorrow, so that is nice.  The weather has been warm all week too.  Well, warm for late November.  But easy enough to sleep in.  So I will take my blessings where I can get them.  It is raining today and bit cool, but still not cold.  It shouldn't be getting cold again until mid next week.

I spoke to my Aunt today.  She is feeling good and doing fine.  I really miss her.  I have not seen her in almost a year.  I raided my piggy bank last year after New Year to go and see her.  I would love to do the same again this year, but I just don't think it will be possible.  The air fare has gotten more expensive and there is no way my car will make it that far.

I hope you all enjoy your Thanksgiving and say thanks for all that you have.  I plan on being thankful that I am better off than many other homeless.

Friday, November 18, 2011


Well a very bad week at work.  A very large order that was made last weekend was cancelled.  So I have made no money this week at all.  I have to hope that tomorrow is better.  Otherwise I have worked this week for nothing.  Or basically nothing.  Not good.

The good news is I survived the very cold temperatures last night with no problem whatsoever.  I was very warm and cozy.  That is until I was more awake.  Then I felt very cold.  I found a good solution for me.  I put sweatpants over my pants and that second layer really helps.  Even my feet were fine without the boots.  I was so tired that I just wanted to get to sleep and was to tired to pull the boots out.  So I figured if I got cold I would do it and the need never materialized.

Tonight is not going to be quite as cold tonight, so I will be good.  So I figure I can make it through most of the winter.  There will be nights that will be much colder, but I can get through the high 20's.  Also it has helped the days have been warm.  So when the temps don't rise above 25 or so that are going to be a problem.

I have to work very long days most of next week.  It is usually pretty busy.  So I hope to make some money. I have decided that I am going to get a hotel room for three nights.  That will help me out with work. The place is within walking distance of my job and is much cleaner and nicer than I normally can afford.  I guess Thanksgiving is not a big hotel weekend.  So the rooms were very cheap online.  I paid less than what I would have for that dump that I stay in if I am sick.  And it has a kitchenette.  No oven, but a stove top.  I can get myself a good meal for Thanksgiving.  The man who has helped me out before gave me most of the money for the hotel.  I was worried about it because where would I go to the bathroom if nothing is open?  I also have to be at work at 4 am.  The joy of working retail on black Friday.  Mandatory 12 hour shifts and you start in the middle of the night.

Four of the stores in the mall are opening right at Midnight.  I think it is crazy.  I have no desire to get up in the middle of the night to go shopping.  I better be getting something to close to free in order to do that.  The malls have to hire extra security.  People will be lined up by 2 am.  If I am not mistaken it is not supposed to be very cold so that will be good for them.  But I still think it is crazy.  I guess since I don't have kids to buy presents for I don't see the need to do it.  I know for customers that come and buy from me won't be getting that great of a deal.  It won't be all that much different than this weekend.  Some sets are even more expensive next weekend than this weekend.  But people convince themselves that they are saving money.  I guess somethings will be less expensive and good deals, but most things won't be.

But the good news for me is that since things will be open later, I will have more time in the warmth and a bathroom. The main concerns in my life at the moment.  Like I have said in the past, being homeless is about surviving today.  Your life becomes very centered on today.  How much you have to eat.  Do you have a clean place to wash up?  Can you find a restroom? Making sure you have something clean to put on.  Thinking too far ahead is pointless.  This has been one of the biggest adjustments for me.  I am a planner.  I don't like last minute living.  I guess it works for some people, but not for me.  But I have learned to adjust.  To the best of my ability anyway.

I have another person to go and talk to on Monday.  This one is very far away, but if they can help it shouldn't matter.

Well, have a good night all.

Thursday, November 17, 2011


Sorry, I didn't realize how long it has been since I lasted posted.  I completely lose track of the time, the days all blend together for me.  That is why I find it amazing that I always seem to make it to work.

Not much is new for me.  The nights have been warm all week, but that ends tonight.  It should be below freezing tonight and right above that tomorrow night.  But it will warm up again on Sunday.  I can deal with two nights.  Lots of layers and boots and I will be good to go.

I saw creepy guy again.  Like I said, he would turn up eventually.  Luckily, he didn't see me.  I was able to make a clean getaway.  I make a real effort to make sure I don't spot him in the places where I have seen him in the past.

The man who is mentally ill hasn't been around in a while.  I hope he is ok.  He seems like a nice man.  I have overheard him when he talks to himself and from what I can gather he is a veteran who thinks they are trying to poison him.  That is why he won't take his medication like he should.  Which is really a shame because he won't ever get to have a normal life if he doesn't.  I sometimes give him my leftover food.  I can't store anything, so it is better to give him what I don't eat then to throw it away.  It won't fill him up, but it will give him some additional calories.

I was finally able to give that young man the sweats I had for him.  He was sleeping.  He sleeps more than anyone I have ever seen.  That is all I ever see him doing.  As I have said, I don't know his story.  He doesn't smell like he is all liquored up.  Maybe just a runaway.  But at least now he has something a bit warmer.  It won't help all that much with the temperatures tonight, but I guess it is better than his tshirt and shorts.

Well I have to get back to work.  Have a good day.

Saturday, November 12, 2011


My hope for a busy holiday at work did not come true.  It was ok.  I had a few decent sales, but nothing like the past few Veterans Day holidays that I have worked.  Now I can move onto the hope that people were busy yesterday and decided to catch the sales today instead.

I do have someone that should be coming in today to place a good sized order.  She took all the swatches home and did her measuring to make sure that everything will fit.  You would be amazed at how many people buy furniture that they can't fit into their homes.  Which of course I then lose my pay when they return it.  In case you didn't know, don't ever listen to someone when they tell you no returns.  It almost never really means that.  Believe me, I have lost plenty of money that way.

I was really cold when I woke up this morning.  The coldest I have ever been.  But, I think it was really my own fault.  I didn't put enough layers on.  I needed to add a sweatshirt and put on my boots.  I have been resisting sleeping in my boots, I just don't think it is going to be very comfortable, but it has gotten too cold to do anything other than that at this point.  My nose was freezing and my feet were cold too.  My feet were not nearly as cold as my nose, but still cold.

You know I have heard you sleep better when you are in a cold environment.  Not sure that is true.

I think I found a solution for my car, but I won't know for sure for another few days. But that will really help me out a great deal if I can get that off my mind.

Off to work.  Have a good day.

Thursday, November 10, 2011


I have been a little upset for the past few days.  The agency that I thought was going to give me some good advice didn't.  They have a reputation of helping people, but again no real help will be forthcoming.  So today I have another place to go to.  This one is very far for me, but it will be necessary to contact them.

I am still very tired all the time.  I have to just learn to accept that.  Until my stress level goes down I won't feel like I am getting enough sleep.

I also had a bunch of cancellations on my days off.  So this week is not going to be a good one for the paycheck.  I am still not even at zero yet, so I owe them money instead of them owing me money.  Not the way you want to go.  It is a holiday tomorrow, so maybe it will be a busy weekend.  I can hope.

I have to get going so I can figure out how I am going to get to the people I am going to talk to.  They may be able to store my car for me, which is really what I need right now.  I don't drive it much so if I can find a place to store it where it will be safe, I can just go to shelter for the rest of the winter and be ok.  Not something that I wanted to do, but I don't see many more options for me.  Maybe I will be better at getting money saved up if I am in a shelter.  That is my biggest issue at the moment.  Every time I get some money saved, something else happens that I didn't plan on.

Sunday, November 6, 2011


My least favorite day of the week is here.  It is going to be cold tonight, hovering around the freezing mark.  Not fun.  But I think I should be fine.  I have enough layers, a hat, warm blankets and new boots.  So I will get through it.  The hypothermia program starts in a few weeks so I will have an alternative on cold nights.  I just have to make due until then.

Someone gave me money for a hotel room over the weekend, so I slept and slept again.  I also ate two good dinners and even a really good breakfast for a change.  So that will keep my immune system up.  That is really my biggest issue right now.  Making sure that I am getting all the nutrients that I need.  I also need to make sure that I am getting enough protein.  If my immune system is off the cold will really make me sick.  I read about can you really get sick from being cold, and what I found out is that your immune system starts to break down a little due to the cold, so it is important that you eat and sleep well.  Since I won't really be sleeping well, eating well becomes that much more important.  I am trying to get more fruits and vegetables into my diet, but it isn't easy.  Partly due to cost and partly due to cooking the veggies.

I also am going to need to make some changes about where I am sleeping........again.  But I am getting used to that.  It is really better to stay on the move as much as possible, but my car being in disrepair has hampered that.  I did that in the beginning.  Sleeping in different locations.  It keeps you off the radar of people and businesses.  If you are only there occasionally they for the most part leave you alone.  They just don't want you to become fixtures and scare off business.  I try to stay near areas that have some people around for safety reasons.

Many of the homeless I know go to places that are much more remote.  I don't like that.  It scares me.  I guess to each their own.

Have a good night all.

Thursday, November 3, 2011


I made a complete fool out of myself yesterday.  I walked into this store and when I saw all the Christmas decorations I broke out in tears.  I am just so amazed that this has gone on as long as it has.  So I guess I am a little disturbed by the reminder that it is almost Christmas.

The cold weather and the holidays was not something I expected to see while homeless.  I really did believe it wouldn't last this long.  I have said in the past I had all these things in mind about what was going to happen, and it has not worked out the way I thought it was going to.

I am still waiting to get a return phone call from one the resources that I was given.  I can't find the address anywhere so I can't just show up.  I just have to wait until they call me back.  Although it has been my experience that in many instances you never hear anything.  I have the meeting next week with that non profit that is designed to help people transition back to having a place to live.

I saw creepy guy again last night.  I had to go find another place to use the bathroom so he wouldn't see me.  I suppose I should have some sympathy for him because he doesn't seem to have the proper clothes for the weather either.  But I can't bring myself to feel anything but contempt for him.

I slept ok with the cold last night.  I was really cold at one point and turned the heat on for a little while.  That got me through the night without any other problems.  My nose was really cold when I woke up, but beside that I was fine.

Someone bought me a really nice pair of boots.  They are waterproof and lined.  So they will help with rain, snow, and cold.  So I should be all set.  I also figure I could sleep with them on and that will help a lot.  As I said, exposed skin is the enemy when you are homeless.  So this will cut down on that.  They are just above my ankle so I can put my pants in them and keep myself warmer.  It also will help about wearing multiple pairs of socks.  Which I don't like.  It is too bulky.  I wear layers all the time, but I try to avoid to many layers on my feet.  Feet are very important when you are homeless.  If you get foot infections, you will be in trouble.  It will make getting around hard.

Oh, my knee is still bruised and a little swollen, but it is fine.

I am on way to work.  Have a good day.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011


I am so mad.  I said I had to laundry yesterday.  I waited until later in the evening to do it so I could stay in the heat longer.  I took the bus to the laundromat, which was not a problem.  I got everything cleaned.  But, since I had not done it in a while my pile was pretty large.  Also, since the clothes are heavier they take up more room.  I had three bags to carry back with me including the anti freeze for my car.

There is always construction going on in this area.  As soon as they finish one project they have already started on two more.  So the major roadway was blocked off.  The bus driver threw us off the bus because she didn't want to go through the detour.  The road was pitch black.  No street lights were on at all.  There was construction workers and trucks on one side then moving traffic on the other.  There were no sidewalks.  I had to walk in the middle of the road against oncoming traffic with three heavy bags.

I couldn't see anything and I tripped and screwed up my knee.  It is so bruised and swollen I am having a hard time walking on it.  The free medical care that you can get when you are homeless is a long ways away from here.  I don't know what that driver was thinking.  There were five of us on the bus.  We could have easily been hit by a car.  The construction guys were yelling at me, and I finally told them to go find the bus driver and yell at her.  She is the one that dumped us off the in the middle of the road.  Stupid bitch.

I called the bus company this morning to complain.  She should lose her job for pulling a stunt like that.  They would be sued if something happened to one of us.  I am sure she won't lose her job, but she should.  Don't you think?