Monday

I am exhausted.  I spent another day filling out every job application that people were willing to give me.  I went to 13 different places, and sent out an additional 6 resumes for jobs I found online.  Still not one single call back.  It gets very discouraging.  The little cash I have is dwindling quickly.  I have about $500 left. 

Sadly, my car is making a noise that means that something is going wrong.  The car is old.  It is a 1999, but it does have low mileage.  Not even 110K.  It should last my at least a few more years as I don't put a great deal of mileage on it.  The most pressing matter with my car is that the registration is up at the end of June.  I am hoping that I will have enough money to get that taken care of.  The police are very aggressive about looking for outdated tags.  So driving it without proper tags is out of the question.  So then the dilemma becomes where do I keep it.  That is another thing they are very aggressive about here.  The car will towed in a heartbeat.  I will also need to get it inspected before I can get the registration straightened out. 

Gosh, life is very expensive and scary when you are broker than broke.  I figure something has to break my way soon.  The odds are for that.  After all I have had nothing but bad luck for the past two years.  First I lost my job, then my relationship came to an end, and since the housing market is so bad I can't sell my house.  I know that I shouldn't complain too much because at least I can rent it to pay all the bills on it.  I make a whopping $35 per month on it.  But it really hurt me tax wise that I had to claim that income.  But like I said many can't rent to cover their mortgage.  I actually refinanced just before I was laid off.  What a total blessing that was.  My payment went down almost $600 per month after that.  But, the down side was all the money I took out of the bank to cover the costs of it.  But in the end it all equaled out.  I am hoping that the rumors are true that the housing marketing is improving in my neck of the woods.  If so, I can sell and have some money to find a place to live.  Or even better find a job that pays what I was making to move back in myself.  I really love the place.  I put a great deal of effort into fixing the place to be my home. 

These are the things that I really shouldn't allow myself to think about. 

I have discovered that if you go to grocery stores in the middle of the day they have samples of stuff to eat.  While it isn't a complete meal, at least gives me some calories without costing me money.  I can't believe how bad my eating habits have had to become.  Eating well is another thing that is very expensive.  The cheaper things are processed and high in fat and sodium.  I can't really afford fresh veggies.  But I do buy bananas and apples. 

Well I am going to back to the job hunt.  I have another mall to hit tonight.  While that won't pay much, it is something.  I can take comfort in having a steady income and find a cheap roommate situation.  That is my plan for the evening. 

I am feeling blessed today because I am not as emotional as I was yesterday.  I spent the day packing and further preparing.  As unless some miracle happens I don't see anyway to avoid it. 

Have a good night.