Tuesday

I have not been in the mood to post.  I am having a hard time keeping myself from breaking out in tears.  I was kidding myself that I would be ok with what is happening to me.  It is very scary not to have a place to go.  It is very scary being alone in your car at night.  I have only $30 to last me until I get paid again, and that is more than a week away.  I am not sure how I will have enough to eat. 

I did have a job interview today, but it didn't go well.  They were not willing to hire me because of my other part time job, but since they too were only hiring part time quitting does me no good.  I end up in the same place.  Actually I end up in worse place because I at least have the hope that I can have a big sale and make a decent paycheck for a change.  This was an hourly position that doesn't pay well enough to live on. 

I am trying to locate some charities that may be able to help me out, but I can't seem to locate any.  As much as I don't want to, I think I am going to have to go and panhandle so I have enough for food.  I really can't believe what my life has become.  It really does show you that the saying "But for the grace of God, go I".  I always knew that not everyone that was homeless was drug addict.  Some people are just down and out.  I don't use drugs and I rarely ever drink.  So that is not my issue.  I had a great deal of money saved up when I lost my job, but over time it just ran out.  I simplified my life the best that I could.  I got rid of all unnecessary expenses and I still ended up here. 

I just hope that God watches out for me.